


all endings are also beginnings

by closingdoors



Category: Iron Man (Movies)
Genre: Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, Canon Divergence - Avengers: Endgame (Movie), F/M, I mean.... Nebula killed a past version of herself.... clearly there are no rules, None of the time travel made sense in the movie so it doesn't make sense here either, if you couldn't tell from the low quality of this writing....... i have a fever, why have one POV when you can have a million
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-07
Updated: 2019-05-07
Packaged: 2020-02-27 12:12:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,631
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18738775
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/closingdoors/pseuds/closingdoors
Summary: ENDGAME SPOILERS.A fix-it fic, because Steve has a spare Pym particle.





	all endings are also beginnings

"But all endings are also beginnings. We just don't know it at the time."

**The Five People You Meet in Heaven, Mitch Albom**

 

* * *

 

 

 

"Six pounds and fourteen ounces," Peggy announces as she walks through the door.

"Which means?" 

"Small, but sturdy," Peggy replies, pulling her gloves off. "They've named him Anthony." 

He stops himself from replying with  _I know._

 

 

 

"What are these made of, anyhow?" Peggy asks one day, studying the last Pym particle he has.

"Beats me," he says with a shrug. She eyes him critically. "Really, science always went over my head."

"Who made them?"

"Hank Pym. He'll work for SHIELD soon." 

Peggy carefully places the Pym particle back in the box. She turns to face him, tapping one of her nails against his temples.

"What's it like?" She asks quietly. "Knowing everything that'll happen?" 

Sometimes, it's comforting. Most days it isn't. He thinks about the things he doesn't know most of all - how Bucky and Sam dealt with him leaving; how the world pulls itself back together after losing five years; what kind of person Morgan Stark grew to be.

"It's a lot," he replies roughly.

Peggy hums. He's not sure what that means; he's still relearning her. After all, they've both changed, both grown into different people since the war. Fundamentally, they're still the same, and he thinks that's what matters.

She gestures to the Pym particle. "Are you planning on leaving me again, Steve Rogers?" 

"No." He scratches at his growing beard. "I'm holding onto it for a friend."  

Peggy hums again. "Good. Because I rather thought it was time we got married."

 

 

 

Peggy doesn't speak to him when news of the Stark's car crash first reaches them. He intends to comfort her, but she carries on with things in her own brusque way, even the arrangement of the funeral.

He'd thought he'd mourned Howard Stark, everyone, when he'd woken from the ice. Living in the world immediately  _after_ Howard Stark is something different entirely. He expects Tony to be plastered across every front page - drinking; taking different women home; making a disaster of himself on the front page. After all, that's the kind of man Tony Stark was, especially without Pepper to keep him in place. Yet the news about him goes silent.

"He's a _boy_ ," Peggy snaps one day, yanking the paper from his hands after he makes a comment. "I don't know why you seem so insistent on otherwise." 

 

 

 

He encounters Tony, once, completely by accident. He's doing a lap of the Washington Monument, long before Sam Wilson's time. He's slower in his older bones. He comes to a complete stop when he sees a familiar figure in an expensive suit and sunglasses walking towards him.

He's flanked by Pepper. She's almost taller than him in her heels, a clipboard in her hands, a pager in the other. She doesn't look where she's walking as she follows him; automatically going where he goes.

The thing that strikes him about them most is how  _young_ they are. Sure, his own hands are worn and wrinkled now, his skin spotted with age - but this isn't where the contrast comes from.

Pepper is still pragmatic and sharp as she lectures Stark on how they  _really should go to the meeting he's forty minutes late for,_ but the confidence which she handles Tony with is different. Tony himself is free of scars, of bruises and cuts, all of which had aged him quickly. 

His hair is still dark and thick. His grin is still sure and cocky.

It hadn't been that, in the end.

 

 

 

Peggy huffs when she gets off the phone, slamming it onto the cradle with more force than necessary. "Blasted man."

Steve glances up from the computer he's trying and failing to set up. It turns out 2008 commercial technology is far different to the technology SHEILD, and Tony, provided him from 2012 onwards.

"Who?"

"Anthony bloody Stark, that's who," she replies sourly. He hides his smile. She's the only one who gets away with calling him by his full name. "Telling everyone and their mothers he's the one wearing that damned suit."

"Well, you know Tony. It was always going to come out eventually," he comments without thinking.

" _You_ know him." 

Steve pauses. He hears Peggy approach him and place a hand on his shoulder.

"Steve," she implores quietly. "Tell me what becomes of him." 

Abandoning the computer, Steve rises to a stand, brushing a strand of Peggy's greying hair behind her ear. 

"Why?"

"He's Howard's son. I must admit I'm rather fond of him, despite his arrogance."

As the years have passed, he's found himself withholding more and more information, as they approach the world he knows. Hell, they're only a couple years off of him waking up from the ice. But he's seen the tell-tale signs of Peggy's oncoming Alzheimer's growing, even if she hasn't. 

"Iron Man," he finds himself saying. "He goes by Iron Man." 

"And?"

"He marries Pepper." 

"His assistant?" Peggy mulls this over. She nods. "I like her."

"She won't be his assistant for much longer. He makes her CEO."

"What in the blazes does he do if he's not CEO?" 

"Like I said, he's Iron Man. And then... when there's no-one left to fight, he becomes a father."

Peggy watches him carefully. She rests a hand on his bicep, squeezing gently. 

"He's who you're planning to save," she remarks, "with the Pym particle."

"No, he didn't - "

"Darling, I am your wife. More importantly, I was an Agent of the SSR and a founder of SHIELD. I know when you're lying." She reaches up and strokes a hand through his hair. "But I appreciate the effort."

Steve's shoulders slump. "He was a good man."

"He still is," Peggy reminds him gently.

 

 

 

After Peggy passes, he continues to live for two reasons: the shield that Sam Wilson deserves, and the Pym particle he keeps in his pocket.

 

 

 

The path towards the Stark residence is long and winding for his old bones. He remembers that drive, years ago, with Nat in the passenger seat and Scott in the back. This time he does it alone.

The first time round, he hadn't really appreciated the house by the lake. He'd been too apprehensive of how Tony would greet him - and then, caught up in his grief, watching Pepper place his arc reactor on the water. Here, now, he takes in the wind chimes drifting in the wind; the vegetables growing in the garden; the deck chairs by the lake. This is the life he had pulled Tony from.

It's time to give it back to him.

Tony finds him. Steve parks out of sight and walks into the nearby clump of trees. Tony is a changed man, a family man, sure, but being a paranoid doesn't leave you. He has no doubt that the man has some sort of technology able to detect anyone that may wander too close to his family. He's right.

"Do I know you?" 

Steve turns, expecting at least one gauntlet threatening him. But Tony's dressed in a button-down and slacks, hands in his pockets, wearing a familiar pair of sunglasses. No suit in sight.

"You do," he replies, watching Tony's expression changed from guarded to shock.

Tony steps closer, until they're barely a foot away from one another. Behind the sunglasses, his eyes narrow, almost cautious.

"You look like crap, Cap." 

Steve laughs. Full, and loud, in a way that he hasn't since Peggy passed. "It's been decades since I last saw you, Tony."

"You've gotta be shitting me," Tony comments. "It's been five years."

"Not for me." Steve takes a deep breath. "Look, tomorrow, you're gonna get a visit from me, Nat, and Scott - " 

"Who?"

"Ant-Man." Tony's face remains blank. "The guy who grew real big at the airport." Tony nods, and Steve continues, "We're gonna ask you to help us create time travel, so that we can go back and get the Infinity Stones before Thanos. Bring everyone back. You do." 

Tony pulls his sunglasses off. "And, what, you got stuck?" 

"No," he says steadily, and passes the case he's holding to Tony. "I lived my life. I came to bring you this." 

Frowning, Tony takes the case, and flips the lid open. Nestled inside is the Quantum suit, complete with Pym particle. Steve watches as Tony sets the case on the ground, carefully lifting the suit out.

"What's this?" Tony asks shakily.

"It's what we used to travel back in time. After we beat Thanos, I volunteered to take the stones back to the points we'd stolen them from, so that we didn't mess up the timeline. But I found someone worth staying for. So now this suit is yours."

Tony's grip on the suit tightens. "We beat him?" He chokes out.

Steve clears his throat. He's too old for tears, for nostalgia, and yet he feels them building anyway. He doesn't think he'll ever look at Tony and not remember him mostly-charred, weak when the kid reached for him, forcing a smile when Pepper comforted him. To think he once thought the man was anything like his father. It feels like another lifetime, when he'd thought of Tony as selfish. Like looking into someone else's thoughts.

" _You_ beat him, Tony," Steve says softly. "You saved everyone." 

Tony looks away, jaw tensing.

"The kid?"

"Alive."

"And I'm not," Tony concludes.

Steve reaches out and places a hand on the suit. "You could be." 

But Tony's staring at something in the distance.

"How could I leave them?" 

Steve follows his line of sight. Pepper's hand-in-hand with Morgan, leading her over to the vegetable patch. They watch as she encourages Morgan to pick the tomatoes from the patch, her long red hair falling over her shoulders. The little girl does so clumsily, a tongue poking out from between her lips in concentration, crouched down on the floor. Pepper laughs when Morgan wiggles in celebration when she picks one, the sound carrying over to the pair of them.

"Pepper was there when it happened," Steve finds himself saying. Tony's gaze snaps back to him, aghast. "She had an Iron suit."

 _That_ , at least, makes him smile. "Yeah?" 

"And she..." Steve hesitates, but knows he needs to prepare Tony for what he'll find on the other end. "She was with you until the end. She forgave you." 

Tony nods, glancing over to his wife and daughter again. His jaw sets.

"Yeah," he murmurs. "She always has been too good for me."

Steve doesn't think it's true, but he doesn't argue. Instead he reaches down and hoists the other bag he's brought with him onto his shoulder. It's time now to wait for Sam Wilson. 

"Thank you, Tony. For everything," Steve says. 

"Hold on. This won't change what happened, if I use this?" Tony asks, holding up the suit.

"Not how it works. Actually, I don't know how any of it works. But, you know... they've just buried you. Maybe have a bit of tact." 

Tony claps Steve on the arm.

"Don't worry, Cap. I've always wanted to crash my own funeral."

 

 

 

"Mommy?"

Pepper glances down and finds Morgan's eyes blinking open sleepily as she places her in bed. One of her small hands reaches out and fists in the front of Pepper's black dress. Pepper tucks the comforter around her daughter and slowly unlatches her hand from the fabric, placing it back down as Morgan's eyes drift back closed. She'd fallen asleep just as people had begun leaving the wake, in the middle of eating a cheeseburger Happy had driven into the city and back for.

Pepper places a kiss to her forehead before she closes the door. Happy's still waiting in the front room, tie loosened, dozing off on the couch. He jerks awake when Pepper enters, rising to a stand.

"You want me to stay?" He asks. "Couch is pretty comfy."

Pepper shakes her head. "I'll be okay, Happy. You can go." 

Happy hesitates. "You know I'm just a call away, right?"

"I know. I appreciate that, thank you," she replies, reaching out to squeeze his elbow.

Happy leaves, and as Pepper locks up, she feels her mask beginning to break. It's been easy to keep it in place, because things have been flowing. Tony had died. She'd watched it happen. She'd held him, and forgave him for it. But then - there's not been a moment of stillness since she'd allowed herself to cry over his body. 

No, instead, she's kept moving. She'd helped the boy get back home by calling Happy. She'd stowed her Rescue suit out of sight in the garage. She'd sat Morgan down and explained why she wouldn't see her father again. 

Because this is how she's  _always_ dealt with Tony, even before they'd become a couple. She'd busy herself by getting things in order. It helps her remove herself from her emotions; detaches herself from the hurt so that she doesn't have to feel it. It probably isn't healthy, and god knows she'd given Tony more than enough shtick for his insomnia, but the long hours of working, the cat-naps between phone calls arranging the funeral and organising his will - those are the things that have kept her sane. Because if she stops, even for a moment, she'll remember watching the light leave his body.

She heads into the bedroom, switching the lamp on and stripping off her dress. She sits at the dresser and wipes away the minimal makeup she'd applied. As the layers fall off, as stillness begins to approach, she feels the grief beginning to twist and turn inside her. 

His pyjamas are still folded at the end of the bed.  _Something to come home for,_ he'd quipped and she'd rolled her eyes, because she'd had no idea how else to deal with the possibility of losing him.

Pepper presses her index finger to the fabric. His death is no longer a possibility. It's something that happened. Something she'd feared for years now, back when she'd first caught him in that suit, riddled with bullet-holes. It happened. He's gone.

She slips his t-shirt over her head, catching the smell of his body wash as she does, and climbs into their bed for the first time since - since everything. It's cold, and lonely, and - 

 _He's dead,_ her brain reminds her,  _he's gone._

And she saw it, she  _saw it,_ yet she can't believe it, because he's come close to death so many times before and always made it back out alive. And that's what he'd always been -  _alive._ Bright, loud, and beautiful. Hers.

The sobs escape her suddenly. She turns her face into the pillow so that Morgan doesn't hear.

Her wedding ring is cool against her skin.

 

 

 

Pepper becomes aware, some time in the night, of Morgan climbing into bed with her. She hadn't even remembered falling asleep. She reaches out and curls a heavy arm around her daughter, tugging her close. Morgan snuggles into her side, wrapping both arms around Pepper's neck uncomfortably tight, but Pepper doesn't say a word. 

 

 

 

They spend most of the morning sleeping. Pepper finally forces herself out of the bed and into the shower around noon and fixes Morgan some lunch after. Morgan decides to go play in her room as Pepper starts washing the dishes.

She becomes aware of the fact that she's washing the same plate over and over once the tap begins to run cold. Shaking her head, and shutting the faucet off, Pepper sets the plate on the side and grips onto the counter.  _You can't be this,_ she reminds herself,  _you are a mother. You have to be strong for her._

She sighs, running wet hands over her face. She grabs a paper towel to blot her skin dry, and it's only as she looks up and out of the window that she spots something moving outside. 

Instantly, she's on alert. They're remote here. There isn't another house for miles. Sure, sometimes, deer wander too close to the house, but the figure didn't seem as tall as a deer. And she doesn't see Happy's car outside. No-one's called to say they'll be visiting.

She summons the suit as she passes Morgan's room. Her daughter is safe, sitting at her desk with a colouring book, and Pepper feels that instinctual need to protect hit her as the suit finally meets her body. The nanites link and weave over her as she pulls the front door open. The helmet comes last, and with it, FRIDAY.

"FRIDAY? Do you see anything?" She asks, crossing the decking and heading towards the trees.

"I'm detecting one heat signature." 

"Human?" 

There's a pause. FRIDAY doesn't normally delay. Tony's AI has always been clever. Pepper finds herself raising a hand, preparing the gauntlet to fire.

"Yes," FRIDAY finally responds. "Human. Approximately twenty feet away."

Pepper holds her breath and approaches the woods. As she does, she can hear the figure steadily making its way towards her. She holds her spine straight, feet shoulder-width apart, and the figure comes into view.

Everything stops.

The suit retracts. She's distantly aware of how cold her bare arms feel in the breeze. There's a ringing in her ears that doesn't stop.

"You wearing that thing around the house now?" Tony asks.

Pepper feels her mouth gaping open. She lets her eyes rake over him. The grey at his temples; the twinkle of his eyes; the small quirk of his lips. No scarring in sight.

He looks just as he did before he'd left. 

"Pep," he says roughly.

Too late, she realises that she's trembling. She goes light-headed and for a moment thinks she might actually pass out. He rushes towards her but she backs away, holding her hands up in front of her.

"Don't," she chokes, tears beginning to blur her vision. "I don't - I don't  _understand_ \- "

"It's me, Pepper. It's  _me."_

He reaches for her again, but she bats his hands away. She watches the rejection flitter across his face while hot tears burn down her cheeks.

"You're  _dead_."

"I'm here." He takes a step forward, she takes another back. "I'm here, I promise." 

"Don't touch me."

"Pep - "

His hand makes contact with hers and before she can blink, the gauntlets appear on her hands. Tony's blasted flat onto his back, groaning.

"Okay, yeah, I deserved that," he gasps, blinking rapidly. "Gimme a minute." 

He stays like that, lying on the dirt, gasping for air. The gauntlets retract and Pepper wipes at her eyes, approaching him slowly.

She crouches beside him. He stares up at her, eyes dark and wide and imploring, the way he always looks when he's asking for forgiveness. She feels her lower lip begin to wobble as she reaches out and cards a hand through his hair. Tony's eyes close briefly, a look of peace crossing him, the look he only ever gets when it's just the two of them. Something inside her chest clicks into place.

"It's really you," she whispers.

His eyes reopen and he catches her wrist, pulling her palm to his lips. A shaky breath escapes her as he presses a kiss to her skin.

"How?"

Tony lets go and pushes himself up to sit, wincing. He waves her off when she places her palm above the place she'd hit him.

"Cap found me. Guess he got lost on his way to his care home. Said I'd invent time travel, save the world, then he gave me a way back to you. But none of that happened to me, you know. Saving the world. Before the old man showed up, you and I were talking about making tapas for dinner." 

"That was five days ago." 

He nods. "And how long... I mean, um... I don't really know how to put this - "

"We buried you yesterday," she tells him softly.

"Morgan?" 

"She's doing okay. I don't think she really understands what's going on." 

"No. Guess not."

Pepper links their hands. She's always loved his hands. Worn, and rough, and callous. From decades of building, of inventing, of mending - proof of how hard he'd fought to stay alive. There'd never been a more reassuring feeling for her than falling asleep each night with these hands holding her close. 

Sighing, Pepper lists against him. His free hand settles against the bottom of her back as she rests her forehead on his shoulder. She's exhausted. Too exhausted to even cry, now. Though it's possible that she's going into shock. 

"How long can you stay?" 

Tony presses a kiss to her hair. "Forever."

"Don't," she breathes, closing her eyes. "Don't say it if you don't mean it." 

"Cap said it wouldn't change things. And, you know, I guess I trust the old man."

Pepper pulls away. He reaches for her, as if he can't  _not_ be connected to her, his hands cupping her cheeks. She curls her hands around his wrists, tethering them together. 

"I don't think I'll ever be able to tell you how sorry I am for all I've put you through," he murmurs.

Pepper leans in for what's supposed to be a soft kiss. But when they connect, she chokes out a sob, because he's  _real._ Solid. Warm. She kisses him fiercely, more so than she had their last night together, when his death had only been a possibility. Tony's hands cup the back of her head and he falls back onto his back. She cushions her fall by planting her hands either side of his head, tasting her tears on his lips.

"Tony" she finds herself saying into the kiss, "I forgave you years ago." 

Tony's breath stutters and she finally relents, pressing her forehead to his. He's  _here._

"Daddy?"

Pepper pushes off of him. They both turn and find Morgan - still in her pyjamas - watching him warily. Tony rises to a stand, giving Pepper a hand up. There's so much of Tony in Morgan, and it's never been more apparent than now, as she carefully sizes him up. She feels Tony's hand leave hers as she approaches Morgan.

He crouches in front of her.

"Morgoona," he croons.

Morgan grins and throws her arms around him. 

"I knew you were coming back," she whispers.

 

 

 

Pepper's the one to answer the door. Tony's pouring the last dregs of orange juice from the juicer in the kitchen. He keeps an ear out, curious to see how she'll approach the situation. He doesn't think he'll ever not be in awe of her.

"Peter," she says warmly, "come on in." 

"Thank you, Mrs Stark. I mean - um, Ms Potts. Ms Stark. Sorry, I - "

"Call me Pepper, kid." 

"Oh. Yeah, okay. Is - is everything okay? Is Morgan okay?" 

Tony places the glasses on a tray. He hears Pepper lead Peter over to the couch. 

"She's fine. Can I get you anything? A drink?"

"Oh, no, thank you. I'm okay."

That's his cue.

Tony lifts the tray and heads into the living room. Peter's sat on the couch, Pepper still standing, and his head is bowed at first. Tony grips the tray a little tighter. He'd been told by Steve that the kid had been saved. Pepper had reassured him of that. But to see him - real, and alive, right in front of him, when the last thing he remembers of the kid is dying? His whole body stops temporarily, unable to digest the sight of the kid right in front of him.

 _Is this how it feels, Pep?_ He wonders.

Pepper glances over to him, all soft eyes and kind smile. She's said she doesn't need apologies, but he knows he's going to give her one every day, for the rest of his life. And hopefully, if he has anything to say about it, it'll be a long one.

"How about some juice?" He says, setting the tray on the table.

Peter shoots to his feet. Pepper takes a step away. 

"Mr Stark?" Peter asks, voice trembling. Tears grow in the kid's eyes and Tony feels a lump rising in his throat. "But you... I saw you..."

Tony crosses the room and catches the kid in a hug. The boy's grip is stronger than he expects, knocks the air out of him, but it's good. It's grounding. 

God, he owes Steve Rogers big time. 

 

 

 

By the time he's finished explaining the whole thing, they're sitting out on the decking. Peter's gone through three glasses of orange juice, his leg bouncing the entire time, and Tony tries to stop his own hands from shaking. This isn't, for once,  _about_ him. It's about how his actions have affected the people around him; how he can try and fix it.

"You're really not gonna tell people you're alive?" Peter asks, voice hoarse. "There's murals for you."

"Send me some pictures of 'em sometime."

Peter frowns, looking out and over at the lake. 

"The world needs you." 

Tony claps his hand on Peter's shoulder. The kid tenses his jaw.

"What does it need this rusty old man for? It's got a friendly neighbourhood Spider-Man."

Indecision is written all over the kid's face. He's not surprised, not really. There'd been a time when he couldn't comprehend not being Iron Man, either. Actually, up until five years ago, that thought seemed unbearable to him. 

Of course, he'd picked up the mantle again, because how could he  _not?_ Half the population of the universe had been wiped out. The kid was one of them. And, from what Pepper's told him, she encouraged him to go. 

And then she held him as he died.

"Listen, kid, one day you'll understand this. But there comes a day, for all of us, when we gotta - you know, do the right thing. And if I do say so myself, dying to save the universe? I think I did the right thing." Tony pauses, watching the ghost flitter through Peter's eyes. "And now... well, it's time to stop being Iron Man. It's time to be Tony Stark instead."

Peter sniffs, surreptitiously wiping at his eyes.

"I really missed you."

"Yeah." He squeezes his shoulder. "I missed you too, kid."

Peter nods . "But you've got a family now. Right?" 

"You're welcome here any time you like. You're a part of this family, too."

They're not his words. Tony glances over his shoulder to see Pepper heading out of the back door. He releases the kid's shoulder, but doesn't miss the smile that he can't hide at Pepper's words.

"Really?"

Pepper leans her hip against Tony's side, one of her hands snaking onto his shoulders, her thumb rubbing against his neck reassuringly. She's not let him out of her sight for more than a few minutes at most, even though he's been back for a week now. It's not the worst consequence he's ever dealt with.

"Yeah," she says softly, looking down at Tony. "Isn't that right?"

Distantly, he hears Morgan running through the house as she plays, laughter spilling through the walls.

"Yeah," he replies quietly, "that's right."

 

 

 

As the sun sets, the sky is ablaze with pink. It paints Pepper's hair rose-gold as they sit by their lake, dipping their feet in. 

"You know, now that you've worn the suit," he finds himself saying, "I'm gonna have to make you a new anniversary present."

Pepper's lower lip wobbles briefly. She takes a deep breath and twines her fingers through his. 

"I'm just glad you'll be here for it." 

Oh.  _Oh._ He's an idiot. 

"Are you kidding? I wouldn't miss it for the world." 

Pepper laughs, glorious and bright. His heart tap dances in his chest. 

He smiles when the sun dips low in the sky, hand-in-hand with his wife. There's nothing more beautiful than the end of a day.

Except, perhaps, the beginning of the next.

 


End file.
